FML

F@ck my Lent

Today, I was driving on the highway in the middle of nowhere when my rear left tire blew out. Night was starting to fall so with no other cars to be seen, I thought I’d better get in touch with triple-A. Too bad I made a promise to the Lord that I wouldn’t use my cell phone again until Easter Sunday. FMLent

I agree, your Lent sucks (42) - It’s nothing compared to the suffering of Jesus on the cross (3690)

Taken directly from Look At This Fucking Idea For A Blog-To-Book Deal.

Have a good weekend. I'm off to hunt down a mentally deficient deal on new skis this weekend.

Taco Dreams and Fiberglass Realities: Let's get emotional

Well, xc skiing is finito here for a while. Little snow and lots of rain for the region, and some particularly bad luck for the kid. I broke the tip of one of a my skis and now I'm grounded from whence I soared with the turkeys (I never really hammered down my technique to rise with a more majestic species). I figure it must have happened when I ate big sh!t on a small descent. I got caught in a lateral groove, which is a break in the general 'V' pattern on a skate surface. This, I've been informed, type of crash is to skiing what crashing on the painted line* is to cycling.

If the crappy weather wasn't bad enough the crash and subsequent lose of my new favourite pass time has turned me from this

I would like to see a shorthand transcript of this aside

into this

I especially like the dry heaving she does at the though of menial labour.

Neither me seems very intelligent, but one is definitely having more fun. Both of these were taken from Greg Rutter's definitive list of things you should have already seen on the toobz... #2! I debated not showing this list and just farming it for cool links, but it's pretty spectacular as a complete work, as long as you don't try to get through it in one sitting.

I'll be putting Miss Lucky on a plane for Mexico on Friday and playing bachelor for the week. Where "playing" is "watching Errol Morris documentaries", and "bachelor" is "surrounded by dirty dishes and stale nachos". She's going for a wedding and I'll send my congratulation/condolences with her and in return get an El luchador mask. A fine trade by my math.

I have my own vacation planned. I'll get around to some details on that later. Plans I'm looking forward to have a way of bottoming out on me. I've come not to believe I'm actually going somewhere until I've return from that place. Call it pessimism or a defense mechanism, but I just don't want to jinx it. The hint is I'll be taking my road bike in to Get Rheal for a proper fitting and tune up this weekend.

Keep yer head up 'til yer fed up.

* I personally find really bad crashes hard to watch without flinching empathy, but it's very relevant to what we [cyclists] all do. Here's a link to see how our boy Jens keeps his head up.

Have you been spending too much time...

@ The Whoa, because I have been spending toooooooo much time @ The Whoa.

<3 Japanese

I find it hard to regret a single moment I spend watching this.

Not to shabby for an old rocker

Monday is definitely not the day. Check out this dinosaur jr. steeze and leave me alone.

Snow job for the Sex List

This is the best picture I could find of the Pugsley behind these clowns with drop bars.

VeloNB Cross Finals were a grand success. Stuart 'The dreamboat' Wight made good on the championship. Good on him. He's a great kid with real talent. There were a lot of unofficial champions there, just on the basis of 43 people showing up to a 2m* wide strip of cleared snow that stretched about 2km**. It was -20C*** and in places the snow ruts were 30cm**** deep. I know that a lot numbers, but just take a minute and do the math. Now, you can go look at some pictures. It was uber-fun.

For those of you not metrically capable: that's *wide enough, **not too long, ***Really frikin' cold, and ****deeper than mud will ever get a PDX cross race.

I took me some cajoling to track down the photo link above. It seems that if you are not on Fecesbook you are irrelevant. It is the only way that people even consider communicating these days. I don't like the idea being given a set format for creative communication or a template for who I will associate with. I've never been one for popular mediums and I'm probably just being a dick about it. I may eventually crack, but I'm not that lonely, yet.

Or, it could be my immense amount of dirty laundry I have no intention of airing on the public clothesline.

It was a nice weekend as far as face time goes. I was at the Downtown Farmer's Market to pick up my Boot Toques and a splash of the good stuff, and ran into a welcome face plus some good news. My bro, Richard, has started Moncton, N.B.'s, first bicycle courier service.

Some exaggeration perhaps, but I assure you, it's meant most earnestly.

Godspeed you, sir. Godspeed.

If you're looking for your own fun in the snow and have a) no snow, or b) no desire to leave the comfort of your chair, may I suggest Død snø (Dead Snow). I'm no film critic, but I do like to criticize, and this is flic is sure to find it's way into the classic zombie film annuls. If you like matter spatter you're in for a frozen treat.

Good Friends & Bad Habits

Mrs. Lucky says I spend to much time on the internet. She thinks it that the lack of common decency and basic manners is starting to lean on my usual jovial self. I told her, "Shove it in yer blow hole, n00b!" and retreated to the comforting cathode glow for some consolation from my Xplorers buddies, H4X0r and mistyknight1972. Seriously though, I'm kind of addicted to this online board game above and by facing head on I'm going to kick the habit. Who's got the time or blood pressure budget for that bullshit, even in the middle of winter. I have to get some real board game buddies.

Holy shit! Did I just say that? In all seriousness I got linked at Evil Cycling. It's nice to know that cool kids on the fairer coast drop by once in a while. Thanks, Stevil.

Some big news just dropped here in the Great White. Not as big as the NHL evidently, because no one is giving Basillie any grief about wanting to play with the big kids. Balsillie has recruited Steve Bauer for a Canadian Elite Team to bid for the TdF. It'll take a couple of years, but we're in no rush.

Steve "The Speedy Beav" Bauer keeping it real.

In other national cycling news, there's been a press release for the CSSC 2010 at Canadian Cyclist. It's officially becoming official.

Here's a neat trick from Lanolin. One can never have too many tools in the old emergency kit.

I'm out to Monkeytown for the cross race (The forecast is for -20ish C and , if you can believe it, that will be a respite from the recent freeze here!) and annual VeloNB pre-season meeting. There is definite need for a meeting of the minds, for some of our dirty brothers are behaving in the old Cain and Abel fashion. Some parties have to get on the same page and some shit has got to be put to bed. I have a club license, they have to listen to me!

Until next installment. Keep it real.

He's no Burt Reynolds

Gotcha!

But then, Burt's never been accompanied by such sexy sandwiches.