Friday, May 21, 2010

Victoria's Secret: I bet it's a cog shaped birthmark

*Edit: I was so pumped when I wrote this it all just came out perfect and then I forgot to hit the publish button and now it's screwed. Oh, well. I'll just edit it. The spin department here at psyclepathic is calling it the first installment in the 'time machine series'.

Busy, busy, busy. I got shit on the go. Unanticipated apartment hunting and moving. Some shorty with a hatchet eying up my job for a slashing -> Shit! Committees and do-gooding. Last, but not least, riding bikes on dirt, like we may run out of it someday.

For those of you wondering where the updates are, I've said it in the past and I like it so, I'll say it again. I haven't been waiting all this time for perfect blogging weather.

The Victoria's Secret race is this weekend. This weekend that happens to be a long one for us north of the border types. Victoria Day! Say what you will about an estranged and bizarre monarchy up here, but no one is complaining when the old May Two-Four shows up on the calendar. I will be hitting that shit, like it's a COED in matching Super Girl pajamas and pillow case. With my own Batman pillow, of course.

Notice: No super tanlines. Must be one of her powers.

Edit: The picture didn't lose any of it's impact, that's for sure. The race was great 115+ riders, great course. I rode with the A cat dudes and finished mid pack-ish with one flat tire. I usually ride B cat, but if the elite guys get to do more laps then it's bang for the buck that trumps. Does this make any sense?

I've actually planned what I'm calling the Inaugural South Eastern New Brunswick Greatest Misses MTB Epeeek! Camping and biking around the region laying waste to all of the bits of single track that I miss the most. The Bluff in Sussex, NB; Green Snake in Alma, NB; White Rock Park in Hillsborough, NB and the race in Truro, NS, if only, to incorporate a neighboring province and fortify the epeeekness of the tour, and in case I start feeling guilty for doing so much riding for free.

I did the tour as planned. It was awesome. I can't imagine a better way to spend one's weekend. I even bagged off work on Tuesday and caught the final short track event of Mike's Bike Shop Cup. This is the best little race series; super fun, even in the rain. Lessons were learned and growth was growed. I learn that it takes a special sort of person to camp in the middle of nowhere alone and Craiguer learned that you should call your track if you intend to pass another rider. Another rider with with his knuckle on one nostril, especially.

I want to shout out, now, to my provincial governing body of cycling, VeloNB. I needed a last minute race license and they came through for me within hours of my plea. Sheila, if ever I become involved in a fire I'm not leaving until it's your arms that carry me out, and with the last breathe left in my lungs I will sing the Bodyguard theme song while you whisk me to safety.

Glamour shot

Sheila keeps the local cycling and racing community close to heart and close to home. Her son is none other than Stuart Wight, a junior who's attracting some serious attention and not just on this side of the big drink. The Pavé loves him and he's headed for some respectable palmares.

While I'm at it, I may as well yell something for the kids at Outdoor Elements, Sussex, NB. I missed Johnny 'Big Air' McNair, but Cole set my local compass for me and was a portrait of mud-caked hospitality.

Towns I've lived in are sometimes like ex's, in that, sometimes I miss them, but mostly just for the riding. (Ohhh! That's right I said it!) My old stomping grounds are assuring you that you will most likely, probably, under normal circumstances not die while trying to ride your from cougar bar A to strip club B. Because, that's how they roll in Monkeytown: Deshabillé (pronounced ds-bl, -b. Don't say you never learned anything from Lucky).

Vo2 Max sent me this handsome NS Cycling Calendar to forward to you all in the Inner "never-never" nettes. BNS has some great events that I wouldn't imagine missing. Gorefest 8 Hour is giving me wood and saddles sore at the same time. This will show up again, but you should start planning now, what with the costumes to make and furniture for bonfires to collect.

Posters? I have submitted a poster for the local challenge coming in June. A little thing we call the Woolastook 5. There were only 2 submissions to my knowledge. Here they are. You be the judge. Which race do you blood-thirsty heathens want to go to?


I don't know wtf is wrong with this picture. Click it to see it see a bigger/clearer one.

Yeah, that's pretty much what I thought.

Well, I'm off like prom dress. Have a stellar long weekend, fellow Canadians, and Yankee (Confederate?) readers try and find yourself a queen and maybe, take Monday off to appreciate the royal family jewels.

You did, didn't you?

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